Our 23rd wedding anniversary came up a lot quicker than either of us expected. The night before that January 24, 2020 date, David and I sorted through the notes and pictures and cards that we had saved from that “happiest of days”.
We rediscovered copies of the letter that we wrote to each of our five adult children. The same letter to each….telling them that we would marry, giving them the date and hoping that they would join us for the small ceremony in the Mayor’s office!
There were also cards of congratulations and good wishes….from so many dear people….and pictures of us all looking so very young!
One thing that David and I had forgotten about —–and it was sweet to be reminded —-was that a few days before the wedding, we put our rings on and practiced what it would be like to wear them all day.
It was fun to think about that 23 years later. David always wears his wedding ring. I stopped wearing mine a long time ago. I don’t feel comfortable wearing jewelry. My sister, Katie, always points out to me how sweet she thinks it is that David wears his wedding ring. I think it is sweet too.
While David and I were talking about how we wore our rings together on that long ago day, I noticed that David was somewhat puzzled.
I asked him why. “I’m over it now,” he told me “but at first I thought it was sad …your not wearing your wedding ring. We had bought them together and wore them together and to see you without yours puzzled me….but then I realized that that was just you, not wearing jewelry. I am fine with it now”.
I had never realized that my not wearing my ring had given David pause. We never talked about it. Later that day while I was swimming, I thought that I would get a tattoo on my finger where the ring would be…. Then I thought, just go home and get the ring and wear it…easy.
But nothing is easy. When I got home, I quickly found the ring in my jewelry box ….and I also found David’s wedding ring from his first marriage.
I always thought that that ring was special. It is of course the forerunner of where we are today.
My original wedding ring didn’t fit so well. It was very tight…. David’s first wedding ring fit much better.
Since our marriage, I had had breast cancer three times. In different surgeries, I had several lymph nodes removed from my left arm which was now often swollen. David tenderly was with me the whole time, loving me even through the double mastectomy.
I am sure I had decided before the swelling not to wear the ring…. I never liked wearing jewelry. But the cancer is definitely why the ring doesn’t fit now—–
So, I decided to wear David’s ring from his first marriage…. on my middle finger on the days that my arm was swollen and on my ring finger on the days that it was not swollen.
I feel very comfortable with that decision. I like old things, things that remind us of how we got to where we are today!